FDA approves the Morning After Pill, Over the Counter for 17-year-olds

On Thursday, April 23rd, 2009, the FDA approved sale of the morning after pill, over the counter for 17-year-olds.  Prior to this, it was available over the counter to people 18-years-old and older.  Though this may be a step in the right direction, to increase availability and access to emergency contraception, we must wonder what kind of impact this will have.

If people are able to access this at a younger age, does this mean there will be fewer unintended pregnancies and abortions?  Or possibly a rise in the STD rate?  Though this is an improvement, this must be backed up with reliable information via the education system, i.e. sex education.  Many teens are concerned about pregnancy, in most cases,  more so than STD's.  Often, young people in the US who are using birth control do not worry much about STD's because they think they are being safe, by preventing pregnancy.  However, in the Netherlands, most young women go on birth control as young as  14.  But, via the school systems and sex education, protection from BOTH pregnancy and STD's is so ingrained in them, that young individuals use both condoms and hormonal birth control (IE. pills, patch, ring, shot).  In the Netherlands, it is referred to as "Double Dutch".

So, although this is now available for younger people, it must be backed up with education.  The morning after pill is to be used in case of emergency, not a primary contraceptive method.  In addition, just because this is available, and can prevent pregnancy, it does NOT prevent STD's.

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But its not real sex…

There are so many fun things to do with your partner that can bring you closer together, that doesnt always end in intercourse.   These "fun things" are usually referred to as foreplay, a word most of us in the sexuality field hate!  Because it insinuates that those "fun things" only have BEFORE the real event, Intercourse.  There is a great scene in Kinsey, where Dr. Kinsey meets with two college students who are married and experiencing sexual difficulty.  The woman is experiencing some difficulty getting aroused and even says, "I'm dead down there."  When Kinsey asks the husband if they stimulate each others genitals with hands or provide genital kissing, also known as oral sex, the husband responds, "Why bother, now that we can do the real thing."

Do you remember the time in your life where you could just make out for hours at a time, or have oral sex in the car with the slight fear of getting caught?  And didn't that make it so much more fun!? Try to include oral sex and hand stimulation as THE EVENT, not just the precursor to sex, but sex itself.  Even though you can do the "real thing" don't forget to incorporate what got you there in the first place.

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why does lube get such a bad rap?

I am always surprised at the people who do not use lube because they designate it for a particular person…usually an older woman or some one who cannot get easily aroused.  Many times I will hear, "I don't need that".  Lube can be for everyone!  Lube can make it easier for a number of things.  For example, if you decide to have manual sex (using hands on each other).  It provides another titillated sensation for your senses…silky, slippery and wet and helps fingers and hands glide along.  Try using some flavored lube like O'my for oral sex.  It is water based but without sugar so it is beneficial to vaginal health.  Also, lubes are a great choice when you are using condoms, which can often dry out.  Just be sure to stick with water based lubes when using condoms.  Today, there are many varieties for choosing lubes, and KY has many different options, for his and her pleasure.  If you are embarrassed about someone seeing you in a store, just order online :)

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Sexting–for adults

Recently, there has been alot of negative attention on "Sexting".  Sexting, is sending sexually suggestive text messages via phone.  These text may come in the form of written words, or sexual images.  This hot topic has been discussed in main stream media because some teenagers have been sending naked images to friends or sexual partners.  One teen may possibly be brought up on child pornography charges for sending naked pictures to her boyfriend. 

Though sexting has receive negative attention with young kids, lets focus on the positives for adults!  Sending your partner a text message during the day about what you want to do to them later that night, can be very erotic and a turn on.  Then the rest of the day you can look forward to what might take place.  Or after a great night of sex or even dinner, the next day send them a short message to let them know.  Don't be afraid to be a little dirty!  You may find it is easier to say "I want to suck/lick your ….. tonight" in a text as opposed to out loud…or "I can't wait to _____ you tonight".  Use your imagination to fill in the blanks.  Or even sweet messages to say "I love you" or "last night was so inimate, I have been thinking about you all day".  And if you have a camera on your phone, send some pictures.  They don't all have to be X-rated!  Some pictures may be more seductive if you aren't really showing much of anything.  But play with it and have fun!  Let the sexplay (aka foreplay) start earlier in the day so you have something to look forward to when you get home.

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does good sex improve a marriage or does a better marriage encourage a good sex life?

Recently there was an article in the Times on Line talking about how marriages with good sex tend to be happier marriages. This really just confirmed what so many of us in the field already know: sex affects a marriage – big time. So, does good sex improve a marriage or does a better marriage encourage a good sex life? The answer we see every day in our center is "both."  

The idea that sex creates greater intimacy sometimes gets lost in our society which seems to have decided that the the only way it "should" work is the other way… by intimacy encouraging sex. As a result so many times couples get stuck in a complicated tangle of "working out issues," or "workimg on their communication" and that can take years. Sometimes it helps. Sometimes it doesn't. Maybe we should be more open to seeig if there is a behavioral answer or a physiological answer that can be addressed more easily and effectively . When you get the cycle moving in a positive direction, that is when you help a couple move back into the bedroom, often that can begin to heal a marriage and put it back on track. Often what follows can be more intimacy, better communication.

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I’ll take sexual fantasy please for 300…

Sexual fantasies are:

(A)  Silly

(B)   A waste of time

(C)  An important component to sexual desire, arousal and orgasm.

If you said "C" you are correct!  Sexual fantasy can be an important part of what drives our desire and our response.   Fantasies can be anything you desire.  Maybe you are imagining a setting like a beach or in the rain.  Many times what we fantasize about isn't necessarily something we want to come true.  For example, you may have a thrilling fantasy like having sex in an elevator, nervous and scared that at any minute…the door can open!  Now this doesn't mean you actually want to have sex in the elevator in which you work or live at.  It just may mean you like the thought of something being daring, without it actually being daring in real life. 

Over 90% of couples fantsize about someone other than their partner.  Again, this doesn't mean you want to have sex with someone other than your partner, but it is a way to explore and imagine something different, without going outside the parameters of your relationship.

Fantasies let us explore different situations, people and sexual behaviors in a safe, healthy way.  The brain after all is the biggest sex organ.  Fantasizing can often bring people to orgasm quicker than if they had no sexual thoughts going on in their mind.  Many people have a "GO TO"  fantasy.  A "GO TO" fantasy is a fantasy you often revisit in your head, that can bring an orgasm on fairly quickly, with sufficient stimulation.  So explore different thoughts and sexual fantasies to find which fantasies work best for you.

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The importance of vacations

My mother was my first "sex educator" and spoke to me openly about sex, love, relationships and intimacy.  When I started progressing in my academic career, my father became more relaxed and also would share words of wisdom about relationships.  One of the many things that stuck in my head from them was the importance of taking a vacation with your partner.  Couples need time away, together, without the typical stressors we experience at home, such as: work, kids, exhaustion and daily household chores.  Vacations offer us a time where we don't have to worry or stress much about anything.  In addition, you are in an environment different from home which can spice things up in it of itself.  You can enjoy the alone time without looking around at the list of other things you need to get accomplished.  Vacations do not have to be elaborate trips to Europe or Hawaii, although those are wonderful too!  You can plan a short weekend or even just an over night stay.  Bed and breakfasts usually offer a quaint, romantic setting, often for a reasonable price.  Or if you enjoy the outdoors, camping could fit anyone's budge. 

Through the hussle and bustle of everyday life and stress, it is important for couples to take time for themselves and reconnect.   Vacations provide insentive, something to look forward to when we are stressed.  They also remind us of why we do what we do, why work as hard as we do.  And sometimes, we all need a little reminder.

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Dr’s Orders: More sex, less waiting

Recently, I started seeing a patient in his early 40's, dating a 39 year old woman.  It was clear that he was crazy about her and wanted to marry her.  I reminded him that if they wanted to have children, sooner was much better than later to start trying.

He said that he needed to get good erections and settle his professional affairs before he could get married and start trying to have children.

I told him I could get him the erections, but that he should not wait to get all of his professional affairs in order to move ahead with his personal life, as it may be too late at that point. And besides, why wait when the really meaningful stuff of life can start now?

He agreed, and I gave him a virtually painless injection using a medication available by prescription, making it quite inexpensive for him. 

He got an excellent erection.

Here is what he reported at our next meeting:  He drove to her house. They had sex for two hours.  After her second climax, he got down on bended knee,  and proposed.

She happily accepted.  They then had sex again.

At this point they are making wedding plans, and are trying to conceive.

It was a good day for all three of us!

(I would bet their parents are pleased as well, as long as they don't have to hear all of the details.)

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On scheduling sex — when you have kids

Often times I'll tell patients with children  that they need to schedule specific times for sex. They will look at me quizzically, not quite getting what I am suggesting. "Good sex" in our society is so often synonymous with "spontaneous sex," that to suggest scheduling sex, is almost like suggesting sex with your clothes on.

So first of all, let me assure you that sex with some clothes on can be plenty sexy! Second… here's a secret: if you have little kids and you don't schedule specific times for sex… the likelihood of your actually ever having sex is about the same as winning the State Lottery. Not so good.

The reality is that if having sex in your marriage is important — and in most cases it really and truly is — you're going to have to include it as if it's a "must do," and schedule it in. That means sitting down and picking a time both of you think will work (not still at the office, not exhausted, no kids banging at the door,) and make concrete arrangements to make it possible. (A babysitter? A lock? A nap first?) Then you need to make this a (nearly) unbreakable commitment.

Don't worry. It gets easier. And you may even find that scheduled sex can be as hot as the spontaneous kind. And guess what? In 20 years or so when your kids move out, you can always go back to the spontaneous kind!!

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How to Stop Eating Junk Food: Top Tips

Medical research has shown that addictions to sugar and eating too much junk food can be detrimental to the health and well-being of people.  Eating a daily diet high in sugar and fatty foods directly relates to obesity, which increases the chance a person will develop chronic health disorders and diseases such as hypertension, diabetes, certain types of cancers and other serious medical conditions.  The way we eat is as important as what we eat, below are simple and important tips a person can incorporate into everyday life to help them stop the vicious cycle of eating junk food:

•    Do grocery shopping on a weekly basis.  Make it a habit to go grocery shopping on the same day each week.

•    Plan out a complete grocery list of all the regular foods you eat each week to make sure you do not run out of food and become tempted to go through a drive-thru and indulge in unhealthy foods.

•    Eat a wide variety of nutrient-rich foods.  The human body needs more than 40 daily nutrients to maintain health and this cannot be achieved by limiting the diet to only junk foods.  A daily diet should include a selection of whole grain products, fresh fruits and vegetables, dairy products, meat, fish and poultry.

•    Do not starve yourself!  Eating a series of six small meals throughout the day rather than three larger ones helps the body maintain consistent blood sugar levels and keeps a person from experiencing a midday crash and crave junk food.

•    Maintain a healthy body weight.  The right weight for a person depends on many factors such as age, heredity, height and gender.  Excess body fat increases the chances of a person developing high blood pressure, diabetes, stroke and other problems.  A person who constantly eats a diet of junk food and sugar is more likely to crave the wrong foods and end up gaining more weight.

•    Learn how to cook healthily.  Join a cooking class, research online recipes and use low-fat or fat-free substitutes for their richer, high-calorie, unhealthy counterparts. 

•    When dining out avoid fast-food restaurants and all-you-can-eat buffets, both of which can sabotage the diet of a person trying to curb junk food consumption and avoid unhealthy foods.

•    Eat regular meals; skipping meals can lead a person to experience ravenous hunger.  When hunger is raging, a person may be more tempted to indulge in high-fat snacks and junk food.

•    Reduce but do not eliminate certain foods.  Everyone has foods they eat for pleasure, but if these foods are completely eliminated from the diet, a person may feel deprived.  Nothing ruins a diet faster than a person feeling a sense of deprivation, which can result in them seeking out rich, high-calorie, sugary snacks that are unhealthy.

•    Balance dietary choices.  When a person is going to indulge or splurge on high-calorie, junk food it is best to select other types of foods that are low in fat, sugar and sodium.  If the diet contains a healthy balance with some indulgence, a person is less likely to feel deprived and cheat.

•    Eat enough calories, but do not over eat.  Maintaining a healthy balance between calories eaten and calories burned can be tricky, but the average daily recommended amount is approximately 2,000 for the average person.  Sticking within these parameters helps a person maintain a healthy  body weight and avoid becoming obese.

•    Drink more water.  The human body is composed of 75% water; it is an important part of health.  Water helps flush toxins out of the body and many people experiencing dehydration mistake it for hunger.  Staying properly hydrated will keep a person from eating when unnecessary and reaching for an unhealthy snack.

•    Start moving! Research has shown the healthful benefits that come from incorporating a regular exercise routine.   If a person eats junk food out of boredom, replacing boredom with physical activity can stop the vicious cycle.

•    Make dietary changes gradually.  A person cannot be expected to revamp their whole diet overnight, it is unrealistic.  Changing things too quickly can lead a person to relapse and eat out of retaliation and anger.  Begin to make small and gradual changes to cut back on junk food consumption and soon enough healthy eating will no longer be a "concept" but rather a lifestyle change.

Making the dietary transition to include healthy foods does not need to leave a person feeling deprived in any way.  Allowing a monthly "cheat" day when a person can indulge in junk food is a good idea because it lessens the chances of a person binging and falling back into old destructive eating habits again. Read More......

Impotence Drugs Useful In Heart Problems

According to the new study it has been proved that impotence drugs are useful in treating the heart problems. Heart diseases are the No.1 cause of death in the United States. According to the latest survey, impotence and cardiovascular disease are linked. Impotence and cardiovascular disease share similar risk factors, and ED may be a marker of cardiovascular disease progression. Thus, there was a question whether the drugs used to treat the impotence can be used for the treatment of heart disorders.

Impotence drugs along with the treatment of the sexual dysfunction in men are found to be beneficial for the patients suffering with the heart problems. Heart diseases are caused by malfunctioning of the heart or blood vessels. In simple words any disease that affects the cardiovascular system is called as the heart disease or disorder. Arteries and veins that supply blood to the heart or remove the blood from the heart are found to be damaged in the case of heart diseases. Heart diseases include coronary heart diseases like heart attacks and angina; raised blood pressure like hypertension; rheumatic heart disease; congenital heart disease; heart failure; Atherosclerosis; and cerebrovascular diseases.

The group of scientists conducted a research to check whether impotence drugs are helpful for heart patients. In which 400 men suffering from one or the other heart disease were given the dosage of Sildenafil, Vardenafil, or Tadalafil i.e. 50 mg of the Sildenafil, Vardenafil, or Tadalafil for the first week and then 100 mg of Sildenafil for the next three weeks. The scientists noted that the level of serum in the men given the dosage of Sildenafil was found to be 6 times more than the normal. Men suffering from atherosclerosis were found to be relieved from the disease because of the removal of the plaque deposited in the arteries. The people suffering from blood pressure or heart attacks were finding a tremendous change in their health. In the study out of 400 men, 350 men observed the improvement in their heart conditions. Thus, it was clear from the study that impotence drugs can be used to treat the heart disorders

Impotence increases with age. It has been established that an insufficient production of nitric oxide by penile nerve terminals and/or vascular endothelium may result in an impaired erection or complete impotence. Mainly lack of blood supply to the penis during the sexual activity causes impotence. Impotence drugs not only improve the supply of the blood to the penis but also to the other part of the body. Impotence drugs improved the blood supply to the heart region and opens up the close arteries that were responsible for the atherosclerosis. Impotence drug along with the improvement in the blood supply and washed out the plaque deposited in the arteries that supply blood to the heart. Impotence drug also relaxed the muscles in the other parts of the body and improves the blood circulation.

The inability of a male to attain and maintain an erection sufficient to allow vaginal penetration is called impotence. It is a part of general male sexual dysfunction called impotence, which also includes libidinal, orgasmic and ejaculatory dysfunction. Impotence affects millions of men and although it may not mean a total loss of sexual satisfaction, it often creates a mental stress that affects the man's quality of life. Nowadays, about 50-85% of impotence patients can be shown to have a somatic cause by modern methods of examination. Impotence may also occur as a result of specific illness or medical treatment, and it is often multi-factorial in etiology.

Many studies have been carried to know how impotence drugs help heart patients. In the studies it was proved that impotence drugs help the person to stay away from abnormal heart conditions. The studies concluded that the impotence drugs improved the overall heart conditions of the men suffering with the heart disorders. But, please consult your doctor before using impotence drugs in the treatment of cardiovascular diseases. Hence, impotence drugs were observed to be very helpful for the heart patients. Read More......

Emotional orgasms. What do they mean?

Some women have asked me why they "freak out"  after they have an orgasm. It's a great question and here's at least part of the answer…

Just prior to, and at the time of orgasm a cocktail of hormones are "released." Every person's is slightly different. As a matter of fact every orgasm can be different! That's why sometimes you probably have littler (less emotional) orgasms and sometimes you have "blockbusters." Different women respond differently to the intense orgasms. Some women feel happy, excited, exhausted, emotionally close to their partner, like they are going to pass out, like there are fireworks in their head. Some people respond with emotions that feel wonderful, or out of control or both. Many women say that their "emotions come to the surface," in a way they usually don't.

If every single time you orgasm you begin to cry or feel really sad, you may want to discuss it with a therapist to see if there is some underlying concern that only comes to the surface when you are having an orgasm.  Sometimes the fragile state you're in after an orgasm can allow you to experience emotions you don't otherwise allow yourself to.

However you respond, it's fine! Try to learn to enjoy your own individual response and "go with the emotional flow." And above all… enjoy those orgasms!

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Typing Jobs From Home Can Bring in Extra Cash


If you consider yourself a pretty good typist or data entry operator, there may be work available for you from home! Contrary to what you may think, not all typing jobs from home are scams. Many require you to take a typing test or have some kind of credentials before they will consider hiring you. This is actually a good thing because it adds to the legitimacy of the business.

Be wary of a company that will accept you simply sight unseen telling you that you can make a certain amount of money based on how many ads you place on the Internet for instance. This is not your typical typing position. Most of the "typing" that is done from home today is done either by way of word processing or transcribing. Medical transcription or legal transcription is a very lucrative business. Many companies do require that you have at least one to two years of experience before they will accept you as an employee. This is because transcription requires learning certain formats or ways to type in the information that is common to their business. The good thing is, once you learn it, you can use it where ever you decide to work.

If a company needs a transcriptionist, as long as you have the appropriate experience there is a strong possibility that they will hire you. There are large companies who have departments strictly dedicated to work from home transcription teams. Many of them even provide full benefits including medical and dental insurance. This is why if you are seriously interested in a typing job from home, you give medical transcription training some serious thought. Yes, training does cost, however in the long run it is worth it. The education that you receive from training can only make the possibilities of obtaining an additional income much more of a reality. Medical transcription also requires special equipment that you must purchase called a transcriber. If you do decide to take a course in medical transcription finding out what the latest equipment most are using is important and will help you avoid having to purchase additional equipment in the future.

There are various web sites you can visit that can point you in the right direction if you look up medical transcription training in your search engine. Be attentive as to what is offered in your courses, how long will you have to train, how much will it cost, is there another course that may offer more for less money? Another good idea is to visit some medical transcription discussion forums and ask questions. Many are happy to answer a newbies questions, they remember what it was like when they were new too.

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